Author: Jade Wu, PhD
Dr. Jade Wu is a licensed clinical psychologist. She received her Ph.D. from Boston University and completed a clinical residency and fellowship at Duke University School of Medicine. Do you have a psychology question? Call the Savvy Psychologist listener line at 919-533-9122. Your question could be featured on the show.
This episode is part three of a three-part series on attachment styles. The first describes the four attachment styles. The second describes four critical ways your attachment style affects your relationships. Before we talk about how to overcome insecure attachment, let’s have a little refresher on attachment styles. They’re patterns of how we think, feel, and act in close relationships. They form early in life based on the way we bond (or don’t) with our primary caregivers. The four attachment styles are: Secure: trusting, independent but close, and open to expressing affection in confident ways with their partners. Dismissive-avoidant: aloof,…
This is part two of a three-part series of episodes on how attachment affects your intimate relationships. Last week, we looked at the four attachment styles. Let’s say you’ve been dating someone for three months, and things have been going well. You have a great connection; you share a sense of humor; you like each other’s friends; you haven’t seen any red flags. You haven’t been going on dates with anyone else for a couple of months now. One evening, this person’s hanging out at your place and brings up the idea of becoming exclusive and officially becoming a couple.…
Have you seen the show How I Met Your Mother? It’s about a bunch of flawed but lovable New Yorkers trying to find (or hang onto) love as they go through life’s changes, which range from silly to momentous. It’s a funny, feel-good, and sometimes poignant sitcom. But what I like most about it is that it’s a perfect showcase of human attachment styles. Although How I Met Your Mother came to an end in 2014, it lives on digitally! In case you’re in the middle of your first HIMYM marathon, I should warn you that this episode contains a few…
Insomnia is one of the most frustrating experiences in our modern existence. You stare up at the ceiling (or worse, at the red numbers on a clock), mind buzzing with random thoughts, tossing and turning while everyone else snores away blissfully. It can really drive a person crazy! Everyone has insomnia sometimes. Even though I’m a sleep expert (and I was lucky enough to be born with good sleep genes), I still sometimes toss and turn all night. And these occasional sleepless nights are totally fine. They just mean you’re excited about something, or you have had one too many…
What is oxytocin? You know those warm and fuzzy feelings you get when you cuddle a puppy, hug your friend, or kiss your partner? That’s oxytocin at work. You may already have heard of oxytocin—what people have called the love hormone, cuddle hormone, or even the moral molecule. This is because oxytocin has been in the headlines, gaining a reputation for making people more trusting, generous, and even more in love. It’s a neuropeptide, meaning that it’s a protein-like molecule your brain cells use to communicate with each other. Oxytocin is also a hormone, meaning that the brain releases it…
Family estrangement is one of my most requested topics from listeners and readers coping with the loss and isolation they feel when someone cuts family ties. In a way, the grief of family estrangement can be more painful—or at least more complicated—than the grief over a loved one who has died. When a family member voluntarily walks away, you may miss them and feel confused, ashamed, frustrated, and disappointed, especially if the hope of reunification is dashed. So why do people excommunicate their family members? Are there any ways to cope or remedy the situation? Four things researchers have learned…