Author: Rachel Vanderbilt, PhD

It can be frustrating when a partner, or potential partner, behaves in a way that makes you feel uncertain: “Why aren’t they texting me first? I am always the one texting first. What if they are interested in other people when they are out with friends? Do I have to worry about them flirting with other people? If another romantic opportunity presented itself, would they actually flirt with them, or worse, try to pursue something with them?” This uncertainty is normal as feelings grow in a new relationship, or as you start to become more serious with a romantic partner.…

Ghosting is an unfortunately common experience for people who are dating. What is ghosting? Ghosting refers to the experience of one person cutting off contact with a partner and ignoring their partner’s attempts to reach out, typically through texting or other forms of social media. Although ghosting itself may not be new (can anyone remember sitting by the phone waiting for someone special to call?), it seems to be a more common phenomenon in today’s dating world. Studies have found that 80% of single millennials have reported being ghosted by a romantic partner. In today’s dating world, it seems like…

Welcome to the Relationship Doctor podcast! I’m Dr. Rachel Vanderbilt and I’m excited to bring you advice backed by solid scientific research to help make your relationships healthier and happier. Today, we will discuss the phenomenon known as Gray Divorce and how you can preemptively work to prevent the decline of your relationship. With the recent divorce announcements of several high profile couples (most notably Bill and Melinda Gates and Blair Underwood and Desiree DaCosta), the phenomenon known as Gray Divorce has entered our vocabularies. It is hard for some to understand how such prominent couples, who were together for…

Welcome to the new and improved Relationship Doctor podcast! I’m Dr. Rachel Vanderbilt and I’m providing advice backed by relationship science to help make your relationships healthier and happier. In today’s episode we will discuss conversations you should have if you are using a dating app before meeting face-to-face. My friend Rose is on the dating market right now. She has been using dating apps for a few months and feels like she is having the same conversations about the same old topics over and over again like they are following a set script. Sometimes she has decent banter with…

Welcome to the new and improved Relationship Doctor podcast! I’m Dr. Rachel Vanderbilt and I’m providing advice backed by relationship science to help make your relationships healthier and happier. In today’s episode we will discuss cohabitation, specifically, the consequences of moving in together before marriage. When I moved to Florida for graduate school, my boyfriend at the time moved across the country with me. In my first semester, I took a course on the communication theories of close relationships. In that class, we were shown data from the 1980s and 1990s, which indicated that moving in with a romantic partner…