How to Build Strong Relationships Between Kids and Grandparents
 Mighty Mommy shares 5 tips to help strengthen the relationships between kids and their grandparents.
This year National Grandparents Day was celebrated across the U.S on Sunday, September 8th.  The role of grandparents has changed dramatically over the past two decades. According to grandparents.com grandparents represent one-third of the American population with 1.7 million new grandparents added to the ranks every year.
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In a perfect world, the grandparents in our lives would be nurturing, supportive, helpful, and respect their role so as not to override parental authority. Grandparents often have the opportunity to spend more relaxed time with grandchildren and they can enjoy children for who they are at the moment—something that is difficult for mom or dad to pull off. Today, Mighty Mommy is going to share 5 tips to help strengthen the relationships between kids and their grandparents:
Tip #1: Define the Role You Want Grandparents to Play in Your Child’s Life
Establishing a bond with grandparents can benefit kids in many ways. Grandparents can be great role models and influences, and they can provide a sense of cultural heritage and family history. Grandparents can provide maturity, knowledge, stability, and unconditional love to the lives of their grandkids. On the other hand, grandchildren can bring energy, optimism, laughter, activity, youthfulness, and purpose to the lives of grandparents.  In theory, this should be a definite win/win relationship for both parties, but it doesn’t always go that route if clear expectations are not set between parents and grandparents.
See also: Grandparents Want to Help
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If you’re a parent and want to foster a loving relationship between your kids and their grandparents, let them know your expectations upfront. You are bound to do things differently than your parents did when they raised you, so begin to introduce your parenting style to all the grandparents in your lives as early as possible.  Sometimes this is difficult to do, I mean how do you tell your own mother, or mother-in-law, that you would like things done differently? The answer is honestly and respectfully. “Mom, we’re concerned about the amount of sugar in those fruit chews, so we’d prefer he eat apple wedges or granola fruit bars instead. Thanks for listening.” “Dad, we don’t think that movie is appropriate for the kid at this age. Can you play one of their favorite board games with them rather than watching the TV? We really appreciate it.” Â
Tip #2: Communicate OftenÂ
Depending on the age of your child’s grandparents, they may not be so tech savvy. They likely won’t text, tweet, email, or post Facebook updates as often as you and your kids, so find ways to keep in touch as often as possible in a way that is comfortable for the grandparents.
If your child is old enough, help him make a phone call to Grandma after dinner once or twice a week, especially if they live far away. People still enjoy getting something fun in their mailbox, so encourage your child to draw Grandpa a picture and send it off in the mail. For computer-savvy grandparents, there are ample opportunities for sharing photographs, highlights from a sporting event, or just sending a thoughtful text or email that says “I love you Grandma, can’t wait to see you again.”   Â
Tip #3: Plan Fun ActivitiesÂ
Grandparents usually get to interact with their grandchildren without the same daily pressures of a parent—they don’t have to worry about driving carpool or juggle making dinner for the family with soccer practice and grocery shopping.  Leisure time like this can be so important for your child because they have a loved one’s undivided attention for a lengthy amount of time.Â
We schedule playdates for our kids with their friends, so why not set up regular playdates with our kids and their grandparents?Â
Encourage grandparents to engage in activities with the kids that you may not have time to do — such as going to the park to collect leaves or driving to a playground that’s not right around the corner. My children’s grandmother is 87-years-old and she still enjoys taking them to flea markets on Saturdays so they can poke around at their own pace. They’ve found collectibles, books, and spent hours chatting about anything they want without feeling the pressure of having to be home for me to run an errand.
Tip #4: Share Hobbies
Many grandparents have hobbies or special skills such as sewing, crocheting, baking, fishing, or woodworking that they’d love to pass on to their grandchildren. Â Â One of my kids’ grandfathers played professional baseball when he was a young man. He has shared his love and experience of the game with my 5 sons who also play now.Â
Even if you have a long-distance relationship with grandparents, have your kids reach out about these hobbies, which will help spark a new closeness in their relationship (especially if the hobby is something your own child ends up loving). They could even interview their grandparent about their favorite hobby and then create a special journal that they can present to Grandpa or Grandma as a birthday surprise!
Tip #5: Establish New TraditionsÂ
It could be as simple as letting Grandma and Grandpa take the kids out for ice cream on every first day of school. Or maybe the grandparents can be in charge of letting your kids plan some type of fun surprise for your wedding anniversary each year. Let your kids get involved in this and see what rituals they would like to establish with their grandparents.
We schedule playdates for our kids with their friends, so why not set up regular playdates with our kids and their grandparents? A good friend of mine shared that her own mother, age 72, came up with a fun way to spend regular time with each of her 12 grandchildren, ages 4 to 20. She called it “Dates with Gram.”Â
They get out their calendars and schedule actual dates, sometimes with a few kids, other times one on one, and they do things like go out to lunch, go to the beach, and spend overnights at her house. Sometimes they even do impromptu outings like going for dinner at the last minute if some or any of them are free.  The result is that the children have grown much closer with their grandmother. They confide in her, laugh with her, and best of all, they even seek her advice on important questions.
How do you keep the relationship strong between your children and their grandparents? Please share  your thoughts in the comment section or post your ideas on the Mighty Mommy Facebook page. You can also connect with me on Twitter @MightyMommy or e-mail me at mommy@quickanddirtytips.comcreate new email.Â
If your kids haven’t reached out to their grandparents in a while, today might be the perfect day to have them do so. Please check back next week for more practical tips and until next time…happy parenting!
Kids and grandparents image courtesy of Shutterstock.