What’s the Right Way to Talk to Your Dog?
Learn how your voice and body language can help you train your dog more effectively.
As you might have noticed, humans have different shapes from dogs and rarely walk on all fours. True, some of us can wiggle our butts impressively (hi, Shakira!), but none of us have tails. We’re not so much with the ear motility, either. Long story short, we’re poorly equipped to speak Dog. Nevertheless, you can use your voice and body language to enhance your training and your relationship with your dog. Or to undermine them.
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What’s the Right Way to Talk to Your Dog?
How do you speak to your dog? Many people use a special “command” tone–louder than their normal speaking voice, peremptory, no-nonsense. To go along with the command tone, they stiffen up physically and all facial expression disappears. Dear me. To the extent the “command tone” does have an effect, it might be the opposite of what you’re looking for.
How Your Voice Sounds to Your Dog
A case in point is coming when called. You stand straight up like a drill sergeant, you bellow “Dogalini, COME,” and often what you get is Dogalini approaching slowly, in a wide curve, with many a pause to sniff the ground or even sit and scratch. Classic behavior that old-school trainers identify as the dog blowing you off. The old-school trainers are wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Here’s what’s really going on. Your boomed command sounds harsh and angry; Dogalini responds with a slow, curving approach to signal her deference to you. She’s being polite. The sniff-and-scratch routines are so-called displacement behaviors, meaning normal behaviors done out of context. Scientists who study animal behavior believe that displacement behaviors reflect emotional conflict. Dogalini wants to approach, she really really does, but she’s just. that. little. bit. scared.
Call Your Dog in a Quick, Bright Voice
High-pitched, quick sounds encourage your dog to move quickly; soft, low, slow tones encourage her to slow down.
Instead of slowing your dog down by bellowing at her, use your tone and body English to speed her up. The behaviorist Patricia McConnell found that all over the world, animal trainers use quick, high-pitched tones to encourage quick movement. (1) To get your dog to come when called, it also helps to turn sideways and even to run away a little bit. Polite dogs avoid a full frontal approach, so your half-turned body makes it socially easier on your dog to beeline. As for running away, it helps elicit following and chasing, and it has aspects of a game. (Watch out for dogs who chase hard and grab trouser legs, though. Running away from them may buy you more enthusiasm than you want.)
Use Quiet, Soft Praise for Teaching a Stay
Just as quick high tones encourage quick movement, so low, slow, gentle tones can slow your dog down. Are you teaching your puppy a down-stay? Then praise her in a calm, quiet voice, and deliver her food rewards promptly but with deliberate movements of your hands. Are you teaching a bouncy adolescent dog to greet people politely, without jumping up? Keep the praise warm and soft, and avoid rapid movement of your own until you’ve specifically taught your learner to cope with such enticements. Are you encouraging a timid dog through a situation that worries her? You may feel thrilled by her bravery, but excitement and agitation are two sides of the same physiological coin. So keep your voice warm and low, and keep your movements easy and loose.
Act Playful to Defuse Potential Problems
A playful demeanor can defuse potential problems, or at least help you not make them worse. One of the commonest complaints people have about puppies and young dogs is that they steal stuff–shoes, remotes, items of food. Many people default to anger as a response; they shout at their dog, chase him down, and wrestle the goods away, or try to. Annoyance is natural–of course it is. The trouble with letting it take you over and going into emergency mode is that at best, your dog reacts playfully and takes your chasing and yelling as a cue for a game of keep-away. At worst, she learns that when she’s got something good you get threatening. Scare her enough, and she may respond with a threat of her own. Formerly, you had a shoe-stealing dog; now, you’ve got a shoe-stealing dog who growls at you when you come near.
How to Avoid Confrontation with Your Dog
A better long-term strategy for thieving dogs is to keep temptations out of range and to teach them to give up items voluntarily on cue. In the moment, though, try getting all excited over something wonderful you just happen to have found in the refrigerator–Dogalini will probably come trotting over to share. Or excitedly pick up the leash for an impromptu walk. Even direct bribery beats setting up a confrontation–when you establish a confrontational relationship with your dog, nobody ever really wins.
Avoid Looming Over Puppies and Small Dogs
Not all our threats to dogs are purposeful, of course. The classic example is the Terrifying Human Loom-Over, familiar to shy puppies and small dogs everywhere. The Loom-Over is responsible for many a puddle and a fair bit of ruined footwear, because what shy puppies often do when loomed over is pee. Small dogs tend to duck behind their guardians, which prompts the Looming Human to follow them, hoping to “show the dog there’s nothing to be scared of.” With his retreat cut off, the small dog snarls and snaps. Yup, those Chihuahuas, they sure are nasty little guys.
The Right Body Language for Shy Dogs
Once more, body language to the rescue. Ignore the shy puppy, or sit right down on the floor and let her approach at her own pace. Same goes for the little dog. You can also turn sideways and squat, if you aren’t at the point of thinking knee replacements yet.
Your body language and voice can also affect the outcome of a potential dog attack –but that topic will get an article of its own. For normal life, just remember that a dog who’s at ease learns more easily. Take a moment to consider what message your body language sends. You and your dog will be pleased by the results.
That’s all for this week! Write to me at dogtrainer@quickanddirtytips.comcreate new email, find The Dog Trainer on Facebook, or follow me on Twitter – I’m Dogalini. I may use your questions and comments as the basis for future articles. Thanks for reading!
Notes
- Patricia McConnell, The Other End of the Leash: Why We Do What We Do Around Dogs (Ballantine: 2002), pp. 53-64.
Image courtesy of Shutterstock
About the Author
Jolanta holds professional certifications in both training and behavior counseling and belongs to the Association of Professional Dog Trainers and the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants. She also volunteered with Pet Help Partners, a program of the Humane Society of the United States that works to prevent pet relinquishment. Her approach is generally behaviorist (Pavlovian, Skinnerian and post-Skinnerian learning theory) with a big helping of ethology (animal behavior as observed in non-experimental settings).
