How to Be Anti-Racist
The Savvy Psychologist has 6 tips for being anti-racist, including why you shouldn’t claim to be color blind and why white people should actually have a racial identity.
Big thanks to Listener Crystal Allen from New York, who wrote in asking about how to handle racist interactions.
On last week’s podcast, we covered 6 tips to deal with microaggressions – unintentional but hurtful comments or actions. This week we’ll talk about what to do if you accidentally open your mouth and insert your foot. Despite our best intentions, we all have, and we all will. Of course we’re not going to solve such a complex problem in a 10-minute podcast, but here are 6 tips for white individuals to approach the issue of racism.
If you missed last week’s episode, How to Deal with Racism, here’s a quick recap: microaggressions are unintended discrimination, like complimenting an Asian-American individual on his English, asking a mixed-race person, “What are you?,” crossing the street when you see a minority man walking your way, or calling anyone “exotic.”
Some microaggessions are particularly versatile: for example, “I’m not racist—I have [insert minority group here] friends,” or “You’re not like most [insert minority group here] people.”
So, no matter your color, next time you find yourself as the accidental microaggressor, think of the following:
Tip #1: Don’t Get Defensive
You’ll just dig yourself in deeper, which will make things more awkward and make you look like a jerk. Everyone makes honest mistakes, but defending a mistake, especially if it hurt someone’s feelings, takes it to the next level, where you don’t want to go.
For example, if you get an Asian-American colleague mixed up with another Asian-American colleague, don’t try to make it right by saying “Sorry, you two look so much alike.” That’s not only defensive, it also blames them and plays into stereotypes, which therefore makes you look racist rather than just unobservant. Plus, they probably don’t even look alike at all.
So instead, apologize. Just say “I’m really sorry about that,” or “I’m so sorry that happened,” or anything else you would say if you hurt the feelings of a friend.
Tip #2: Don’t Say “I’m Color Blind” or “I Just See Everyone as Human”
Even if you wish this were true, there are 3 reasons not to say this:
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A. It’s not true. You’re not color blind. Racism is both an individual and a societal issue, but they’re not mutually exclusive. You can’t purify yourself of racism while living in this world. It’s like trying to remain clean while walking straight through a mud puddle.
I had an acquaintance in college who claimed she was so color blind that she could have an entire conversation with someone and come away having no idea what the person’s race was. She was well-intentioned, but it sent the message that race was something to be ignored. Which brings us to the second reason not to say you’re color blind… - B. People are usually proud of their heritage or ethnicity and more often than not, it’s part of their very identity. To willfully ignore that is to ignore an important part of who they are.
- C. Claiming to be color blind minimizes the problem of racism and the fact that people of color deal with it every single day. It’s not something that can be solved by collectively covering our eyes. On the contrary, if we’re ever going to move forward, it will be with eyes wide open.
Tip #3: Speak Up
Tip #3: Speak UpYou’re allowed to talk about racism and speak up when you see something happen that raises your hackles. This is actually key. The idea that stopping racism is the responsibility of people of color or that white people can’t do anything about it is a misconception. You have the power to advocate for change. Don’t be afraid to use it.
Tip #4: Have a Racial Identity
Oftentimes, when asked to describe their racial background, white individuals will say something like “Hmmm, well, I don’t really have a race. I’ve never really thought about it. I’m not really anything.”
Actually, it’s OK to say you’re white. Having no racial identity demonstrates not only that you don’t have to think about race, a privilege that people of color don’t have, but also that you don’t realize it, which I’m sure is not your intent.
At the same time, you don’t need to apologize for being white. You don’t speak for your entire race, just as minority individuals don’t speak for theirs. Build an anti-racist white identity by educating yourself about privilege, being aware of what your race gets you, and supporting changes that let everyone share the same starting line.
Tip #5: Don’t Let Others Denigrate You as an Individual
An essay from a white Princeton undergrad made the rounds of social media recently after he was told by a classmate of color, a bit flippantly, and with a bit of hostility, “Check your privilege.”
In the essay, he discusses his family’s time in a concentration camp and rise from pennilessness to prosperity through education and hard work. I salute his family and their sacrifices. You can find a link to his essay here.
I agree that he, as an individual, shouldn’t be held up as “the oppressor.” Just like people of color should be able to excel and achieve without being thought of as a credit to their race, individual white people should not be held responsible for history.
That said, to quote The New York Times Op-Ed columnist Nicholas Kristof, who is white,
“I think for people who were born on third base, and whose friends were born on third base, and who assume a third base context, it’s really hard to understand the enormous obstacles that face those who in early life encountered a much less rosy environment. It’s so easy to hit a home run from third base and say, ‘Boy, this is pretty easy, why can’t everyone else do this?’”
The Princeton writer’s point was that his family did not start on third base and that he and his family have struggled and worked hard. All this is true, and yet throughout American history, it has been easier to make it around the bases if you’re white.
Which brings us to…
Tip #6: Educate Yourself About White Privilege
There’s no need to flog yourself or feel guilty, but be aware of how the system is stacked. This will hopefully inspire you to work for change, both internal and external.
The classic 1988 essay “White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Backpack,” by Dr. Peggy McIntosh, who is white, is a great place to start. To use some of her examples, it can be startling to realize that, as a white person, you can be pretty sure that if you ask to talk to “the person in charge,” you will be facing a person of your race.
Or that you can be sure that if you need medical or legal help, your race won’t be an issue. Or that you can arrange to protect your children most of the time from people who might not like them. Links to dozens more of her observations and two versions of her essay can be found hereopens PDF file and here.
Missed last week’s episode? Check it out: How to Deal with Racism, then share your experiences with us. Have you been the victim or witness of microaggression? How did you react? Share your thoughts on the Savvy Psychologist Facebook page.
Refrences
Gushue, G.V. (2004). Race, color-blind racial attitudes, and judgments about mental health: A shifting standards perspective. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 51, 398-407.
Neville, H. A., Worthington, R. L., & Spanierman, L. B. (2001). Race, power, and multicultural counseling psychology: Understanding White privilege and color-blind racial attitudes. In J. G. Ponterotto, J. M. Casas, L. A. Suzuki, & C. M. Alexander (Eds.), Handbook of multicultural counseling (2nd ed., pp. 257–288). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.
About the Author
Dr. Ellen Hendriksen was the host of the Savvy Psychologist podcast from 2014 to 2019. She is a clinical psychologist at Boston University’s Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders (CARD). She earned her Ph.D. at UCLA and completed her training at Harvard Medical School. Her scientifically-based, zero-judgment approach is regularly featured in Psychology Today, Scientific American, The Huffington Post, and many other media outlets. Her debut book, HOW TO BE YOURSELF: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety, was published in March 2018.
