Selfie Etiquette
When it comes to taking selfies, there’s a fine line between fun and appropriate and the absolutely absurd. Modern Manners Guy clears up any misunderstandings about selfie etiquette.
Richie Frieman
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Selfie Etiquette
For those of you who don’t yet know what a selfie is, allow me to numb your brain with a definition from The Oxford English Dictionary (yes, this term is in The Oxford English Dictionary). A selfie is:
A photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam, and uploaded to a social media website.
And when it comes to anything being done solely for social media, you know there is going to be unmannerly behavior a-plenty. That’s where I step in.
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To say I’m shocked that the concept of selfies has gotten out of hand is to say I’m shocked that a carton of milk became spoiled after sitting out in the sun all day. It’s inevitable for people to throw all reason out the window when it comes to taking photos designed only for getting attention on social media. But I’m still astonished at the lengths people will go to in order to embarrass themselves.
It turns out, I’m not the only one who despises improper selfies. Take a look at Jimmy Fallon’s skit called “Ew” about teenage girls discussing all things “teenage” and being obsessed with selfies, including the horrific duck face (oh, duck face, how I loathe thee).
So let’s get this unmannerly party started with a few selfies that we must stop doing #asap #forreal #trustmeyoulookridiculous:
Tip #1: No Duck Face
In the world of bad selfies, the first and worst type that comes to mind is the dreaded duck face. The duck face is when you push your lips together in a combination of a pout and a pucker, giving the impression that you have larger cheekbones and bigger lips (thanks Urban Dictionary). The duck face selfie seems to be largely popular with the female crowd and holds no bearing on age. You can have15-year-olds posing with duck face outside school, and then their moms posting photos of themselves with the same ridiculous expression while out to dinner with hashtag #girlsnightyeah!
Ladies, here’s a tip from all the males in the world: We think the duck face is beyond hideous!
I know that selfies are a form of self expression and it’s up to every person as to how they want to pose for a picture on their own Facebook or Twitter page…but why make yourself look this stupid on purpose? I’m no model but I’d much prefer a photo where I look at least half decent, rather than contorting my face to make me look like lip injection nightmare.
What’s wrong with smiling? Or just a neutral face? Why would you get all dressed up for a night out, and ruin it with the duck face? I’m shaking my head as I write this (or as we say on Instagram #smh). Not that a duck face is unmannerly, or improper, it’s just ridiculous all around!
I beg you, on behalf of all the fathers out there with little girls, let’s make this trend stop before our girls are teenagers.
Tip #2: The Zombie Selfie
A zombie selfie is when someone stares blankly into the camera with their eyes wide open and tongue hanging out, as if stuck in a trance and unable to control the muscles in their face (aka, like a zombie).
Sadly, the people who take these pictures can control their face, they just choose not to. Similar to the duck face, the zombie selfie has somehow become synonymous with “cool” and there’s no rhyme or reason as to why people want to post photos of themselves looking like the Crypt Keeper.
This tends to be popular among teenagers of both genders, and in all situations the slack-jawed, brain-dead look does nothing for a photo. Earlier this year, while at a family get-together, my cousins and I decided to take a selfie. On the count of three I smiled, and they looked like they were extras from The Walking Dead.
Is it bad manners to take zombie selfies? Technically…no, it is not. But in reality, you look completely foolish – like you’re trying way too hard to be cool.
Selfies are supposed to be fun, so play around, make funny faces, go nuts. But let’s ditch the zombie. Similar to the duck face, it adds nothing. In fact, it takes away. I don’t want to look back at years of Instagram photos and know that I ruined high points of my life by looking like I just swallowed a bottle of downers.
Tip #3: Selfies in Bad Taste
Last year an article about tasteless selfies made its way around the web, showing people taking selfies in places like funerals, or doing rich-kid gang signs at the Pearl Harbor Memorial. In these selfies, rather than simply commemorating a sad moment in time, these people posed with duck face, zombie face, and other totally silly gestures. You know because a photo inside a Holocaust gas chamber definitely needs your sarcastic commentary.
This type of selfie is a serious issue because the insane overuse of selfies has gotten so out of control that people can’t separate themselves from an event they are capturing. I mean, what does adding your duck face and a thumbs up in front of the 9/11 Memorial supposed to be saying? No, seriously, I want to know. If you can make an argument for why or how that’s appropriate, please do, I’m all ears. Until then just know you look like a classless lunatic.
This isn’t me being a parent wagging a finger at the young people. Nor is this a rant from a stuffy etiquette columnist. My point is about common sense. No matter how irreverent you are, at some point it’s time to recognize that posting photos of yourself throwing up gangsta-peace signs in front of a monument to remember a tragic event is just not OK.
When it comes to posting photos of a place with a morbid history, leave yourself out of it. You should share photos of these places because people need to see and remember the horror that others endured and hope we never repeat it. But that does not mean you have to be in it. After all, it’s your account, we’ll see your name, so you will get the credit for the picture – don’t worry about that.
And if you happen to come across some lowbrow “friend” who decides to take this kind of selfie, kindly mention to them that they may have missed the true meaning of where they were.
We all have photos we wish we never took, or photos we wished were never taken of us, but why purposely add more to that list? The next time you get ready to post a selfie, stop and think – is it worth it?
As always, if you have another manners question, I look forward to hearing from you at manners@quickanddirtytips.com. Follow me on Twitter @MannersQDT, and of course, check back next week for more Modern Manners Guy tips for a more polite life.
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