The Manners of Passing Gas

Today’s topic: It’s a gas!

Sometimes listeners write in with the funniest questions–this one is not for the sensitive listener, and today we’ll be both quick and dirty.

In a message entitled, “Quick and Smelly Tip,” JH writes,

“What is the best way to deal with passing gas?  Pretend it didn’t happen?  A polite ‘Excuse me’?  Bail out early on plans? Please advise. My sister and I have been debating this one.”

Thank you for writing, JH, and I have to admit you made me chuckle with your question. But let me offer some suggestions.

First of all, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure–if you know that certain foods make you gassy, try to avoid them if you can when you know you’re going to be in a social situation. But if you’re stuck with gas and a crowd of people, here are a few thoughts: 

• If you can hold it in without causing yourself medical distress, then try to keep it contained until you are in a better place or situation.

• Excuse yourself and go to the bathroom, even if it is just to pass some gas. This is thoughtful of other people and less embarrassing for you. 

• If you absolutely can’t contain it, then excuse yourself, but do so discreetly.

• If your emission is odorless and silent, then you might do well not to call any further attention to the situation.

• If it’s silent but deadly, you might consider the humorous approach if it is a casual setting, and relieve the tension by excusing yourself and blaming the non-existent dog. 

• If it’s too late for discretion and it’s an informal group, you could add a little wit when you excuse yourself, saying something like, “Please excuse me, in addition to Jupiter and Saturn, it seems I’m another gas giant.”

Now I realize these suggestions may cause a little controversy, so I invite you to add your comments and suggestions below.  Perhaps other listeners have a few helpful suggestions they would like to add to this.

[[AdMiddle]

And thank you for listening to quick and dirty tips for a more polite life.

Send your question and comments to manners@quickanddirtytips.com Or post your question on the Modern Manners Guy Facebook page. The Modern Manners Guy is part of the quick and dirty tips network. Check out the other great shows we have while you’re here on the site.

Passing Gas image from Shutterstock