Tips for Scheduling and Attending Parent-Teacher Conferences
The most important part of the parent-teacher conference is that you attend. If possible, both parents should be there. The more you know about what is going on with your child at school, the more you can be involved and make a difference.
This week just happens to be the end of the first semester at my daughter’s school. At this time, the school sends home report cards to let us know how our kids are doing. We get a snapshot of their academic standings and behavior in school. Unfortunately, a snapshot really isn’t enough to know exactly what’s going on. Usually around the same time report cards come out, you’ll also receive a request for a parent-teacher conference. The parent-teacher conference can provide you with much more information than a piece of paper with a few numbers and letters on it. You need to make the most of the 20 or 30 minutes set aside for you though.
Is It Really Important to Attend the Parent-Teacher Conferences?
If possible, both parents should be there. The more you know about what is going on with your child at school, the more you can be involved and make a difference. Attending also lets your child know you care how they’re doing in school. As a matter of fact, if you are as involved as you should be with your child’s academics, you probably won’t be surprised by any information given to you at the conference. You’ll already know what’s going on at school, and if you’ve been helping with homework and following up with your child, you’ll be better prepared to discuss strategies for improvement. Remember, the teachers are making time for you to talk specifically one-on-one about your child. Please respect this time and use it wisely. Teachers work very hard to do what’s best for your child. If you can’t make your scheduled appointment, be sure to call and reschedule. It is important to be on time and be prepared with any questions you may have.
What Questions Should You Ask at Parent-Teacher Conferences?
When you arrive at the conference, the teacher will have information to give you. Take the time to listen and review the information provided, but make sure that you have a chance to ask all of the questions you want to ask as well. If you are like me, you’ll want to write questions down as you think of them and bring the list with you. Highlight or star the most important items you want covered as you may find that you have a lot more questions than you and your teacher have time to cover. You can always schedule another date to speak further, but make sure you have a chance to discuss the most pressing issues. My daughter’s school actually sends home a list of possible questions to help parents who may be struggling coming up with their own. I love that the school does this and I’d like to share some of my favorite questions they recommend:
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How is the class organized?
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What is the daily routine?
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Has my child shown any special interests or abilities?
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Does my child work well on her own, or does she need close supervision?
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What do you expect of me as the parent of a child in your class?
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How can I help my child learn at home?
Don’t Be on the Defensive
There is always the possibility that you might hear something about your child that makes you unhappy or disappointed. Though most teachers try to convey any negative behavior patterns or places where improvements are needed in as gentle and as positive a manner as possible, we still might feel defensive. Let’s face it–that’s our kid she’s talking about! How dare the teacher say that about my kid! Grrr! OK, take a deep breath and remember, we’re in this together. You have to work WITH the teacher, not against her. I don’t know any teachers who are in it for the money. As someone who actually went to college to become a teacher, I can tell you it’s all about the kids and teaching and helping. Teachers are there because they want to be there. They want to see your child grow, flourish, and become educated. It’s not a well-paid job, but it’s a challenging one and is rewarding when kids are successful. As parents, we can help our kids and our teachers to be successful. Listen to what the teacher tells you about your child and ask questions. Make suggestions about things YOU can do to help improve your child’s education. Ask the teacher if there is something special you’d like her to do to help your child improve in areas where she make be lacking. If you work together, everyone will be happier and more importantly, your child’s chance of success in school will improve considerably.
Should Your Child Attend the Conference?
I’ve had a few people ask me how they feel about children attending their own parent-teacher conferences. I definitely see the pros and cons of this and I don’t have a definitive answer to offer. If your child is sensitive to being talked about while she’s in the room, you might want to consider leaving her at home. If you feel that she could benefit from hearing the discussion and it would be a positive experience for her, then you may want to include her. Again, this goes back to being involved and knowing what’s going on to begin with. In a previous episode, I talked about volunteering at school when and if you can. If you have been lucky enough to have the opportunity to be in the classroom, you’ll be more in touch with what’s been happening and with how your child is doing. So, keeps these things in mind. Make time to attend the parent-teacher conference, show up with questions prepared, and be ready to help make improvements as needed and as always stay involved! All of these things will lead to a much better educational process for everyone! Even you!
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