What Should You Do When Someone Crowds You In Line?
Waiting in line and manners don’t always go hand in hand; make sure you’re acting the right way with these 3 tips.
A few weeks ago, I tweeted and posted a Facebook comment about a rather uncomfortable experience I had while waiting in line for coffee. The comments I got were so hilarious that I had to focus on this topic deeper. For those that didn’t get the tweet or see the posting, here’s what I wrote:
I was getting coffee this morning and the person behind me was so close they could count the freckles on my neck. When I turned my head to kindly say something, the brim of my hat almost bumped them. They only THEN apologized. And, we were the only ones in line too.
Here’s my manners quick and dirty tip: don’t crowd someone when you are waiting in line… or as my New York friends say, waiting “on line.”
So, as I was saying, crowding someone in line is beyond rude and, even worse, an invasion of privacy and personal space. The last thing I want is to feel like I’m a part of a freak line at some college nightclub while getting my coffee. So, when improper manners attack, I fight back by creating my top three tips for proper line etiquette.
Line Etiquette Tip #1: Don’t Crowd, EVER
The undisputed, undefeated champion of improper line etiquette is crowding someone. Like the goofball who crowded me at the coffee bar, the invasion of personal space can really test your patience with people. Unless I’m stranded on the top of Mt. Everest, I don’t want someone to have press up against me as if we’re trying to survive.
One thing people tend to forget is that no matter where you are in line, you will not get there faster by smashing up against the person in front of you. If you are behind me in line, after I am done, it’s your turn–simple science here folks. If you are so close to me that it looks like I may have a conjoined twins, then you are WAY too close. And guess what–it won’t help you at all. You’ll still be after me.
So how do you confront this situation?
When this happens, kindly ask the person behind you if they could step back a foot or two. Don’t be rude when you do this; just give them a notice and let them move back. You can be honest, like, “Excuse me, would mind just taking a few small steps back?” Which I’m sure they’ll take notice on. Or, if you want to be creative, and make sure they definitely don’t do it again – to you or someone else – say something like, “Excuse me, would mind just taking a few small steps back? I have a cold – don’t want to get you sick.” A great way to get your space.Â
Sometimes they may not even notice they were crowding and will apologize right away. If they do know they are crowding but could care less about your comfort zone, then don’t worry about offending them… they need the wake up call.
Line Etiquette Tip #2: Use Your Inside Voice
This past weekend, I was alarmed to hear that Linda and Jay were splitting up. It was a nasty breakup too (they should have article about How Not to Break Up With Someone). Apparently Jay had been cheating on Linda with her roommate Michelle. Oh, one thing I forgot to mention was that I have never met either Linda or Jay. Confused? I learned all of this because Linda was screaming her conversation at the top of her lungs, on her cell phone, while I was in front of her at the grocery store. Everyone turned around to stare in embarrassment about the incredibly poor manners Linda was so vocally displaying. However for the record, I am “Team Linda” all the way. What a loser, Jay.
When in line, you need to use your inside voice. Shouting on your cell phone as if you were stuck in a wind tunnel is not necessary. And if your call is that important then step out of line and return when you are done. If you are so unfortunate to witness this improper behavior, you have a few options:
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For the non-confrontational type, try and tune them out, which will be very hard to do.
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Ask them to go ahead of you so they can get out faster and save us all!
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Ask them if they wouldn’t mind speaking a little softer. Blame it on a “headache” if needed. Even go for some humor, “Look, I am with you; that guy is a jerk… but you might want to wait until you leave to finish this conversation.” Then give the ol’ head nod towards the direction of some other onlookers.
Line Etiquette Tip #3: Try a Little Tenderness
This next tip tends to best be put to use in grocery or clothing stores. There is always one person in line with one item, while the person in front has twenty. And in the spirit of the holidays, I am asking us all to try a little tenderness and allow those with one item to go ahead of you.
Okay, okay, I know you were there first and I know how bad you want to get out, but so does everyone. The guy behind you, in sweats, holding a roll of toilet paper and Imodium AD probably needs to get out faster than you do anyway, so be kind and allow them to go ahead of you.
Do you have a great story about how you witnessed some rather improper manners in line? Post them on my Modern Manners Guy Facebook page so we can all laugh with you. As always, if you have another manners question, I’m look forward to hearing from you so drop me a line at manners@quickanddirtytips.comcreate new email. As well, don’t forget to follow me on Twitter @ MannersQDT. And of course, check back next week for more Modern Manners Guy tips.
Image courtesy of Shutterstock