Responsibility Lessons from the U.S. Secret Service
Even though we hate to admit our mistakes, it’s a powerful thing to do. Cover-ups, however well-intentioned, are usually a disastrous choice. Just look at the U.S. Secret Service fiasco…
When you were little, your parents and teachers told you that someday you’d be a grown-up, and that grown-ups were more mature than kids. Grown-ups take responsibility, put in an honest day’s work for an honest day’s wage, deal with each other with consideration and open minds, stand by their word, and stuff like that. At least, that’s what they told me. I’m sure in the back room, they were doubled over in laughter at my youthful naiveté.
Why?
Because none of it—none—is true.
This past week the head of the U.S. Secret Service Julia Pierson was being grilled by Congress. The Secret Service’s job is to protect the President. It’s their first, foremost, and primary job. But they had a little “oops.” They let a guy with a knife get pretty far into the White House before catching him. (Apparently, the White House doesn’t have the same kind of motion detecting burglar alarm that my apartment does.)
The head of the Secret Service stood before Congress and said, “Mistakes were made.” I’m so relieved to hear that. Aren’t you? I didn’t realize that letting armed intruders into the White House was a mistake. I thought it was the way things were supposed to work.
Of course, the passive voice is masterful! Had she used the active voice to say “I made a mistake,” I might have thought that perhaps she set up inadequate employee screening. Or that Secret Service policies and procedures were broken or cumbersome. Or that she didn’t implement oversight, or training, or cultivate a culture of excellence and pride in the work at her organization.
But since she said “Mistakes were made,” in a passive voice, I realize that there’s nothing she could have done to avoid this massive breach. My heart swells in admiration at this sterling role model of leadership. I can’t imagine a more competent, inspiring leader.
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Cover-Ups Don’t Work
When you don’t deliver on a promise you’ve made, a product you were supposed to create, or a job you were supposed to do, everyone knows it. It isn’t a secret. Yet our first instinct is to hide.
“No, Mommy, I didn’t take the cookies!” we say, as crumbs fall out of our mouths. “Mistakes were made, but not by me” worked when you were 7 because the grown-ups were being polite. They didn’t actually believe you. Mommy saw the crumbs. And today, your workgroup knows your deliverable didn’t deliver.
Excuses—especially obvious ones—just make things worse. People often forgive failure. People virtually never forgive cover-ups.
Nor should they. When you screw up, you put us at risk once. But screw-ups happen. We get that and we can forgive. But when you cover it up, we can’t trust you to recognize and fix future screw-ups. A cover-up tells us you’re putting us at risk forever.
So what’s the alternative?
Admit Your Mistakes
You know what the three scariest words are in the English language? What three words cause even the manliest-man to run screaming out of the room? No, not “I love you.” It’s “I was wrong.”
But when the time comes, you have to say it. You’re only saying what everyone is thinking anyway. And since that’s the case, own your mistake! Admit it. Use active voice. “I made a mistake.” “I didn’t deliver on my promise.” “My code was full of bugs and delayed the team.”
First and foremost, use a confident voice tone. A weak little “Omigosh I screwed up! I’m so so so sorry. I’m worthless slime, even lower than the lowest barnacle” is admitting a mistake, but it goes too far. It also says “I’m prey! Hunt me down!” The rest of your workgroup, being predators, will tear you to shreds, feasting on the bloody remains of your reputation.
A confident voice tone is very different. “I screwed up.” The words say you didn’t deliver. The voice tone says you’re calm, competent, and still in control of the situation (even if you really aren’t, deep down inside).
Apologize
Next, apologize. Be genuine. Take a few moments to actually feel sorry. You let people down. This time around, you’re “that guy” (or girl, or intersex). You caused other people distress. Own it. You may be a good person, but this time, you did a bad thing. Give a sincere apology. “This was my responsibility and I didn’t fulfill it. I screwed up. I’m sorry.”
You’ve addressed the substance—your screwup—and the relationship issues—you caused harm to others, and you’re sorry about it. Now move on.
Paint a Path Forward
If it’s possible, propose a plan for how you—yes, you—will fix the situation going forward. Make sure you can do what you propose, of course. You don’t want to be “that guy” (or girl, or intersex) twice. If you need to ask for the team’s help, ask. You can even just say, “This was my responsibility and I didn’t fulfill it. I screwed up. I’m sorry. I want to make it right, but I don’t know how. What’s a good path forward?”
If there’s no way to recover, and your mistake was, indeed, the kind that requires you to leave, then resign gracefully. If the mistake is a fireable offense, then you’re gone either way. You can go kicking and screaming, or you can leave maturely, taking responsibility for your actions, and choosing your path forward.
We all make mistakes. And next time you do, resist the urge to stage a cover-up! They rarely work and just make you look bad. Instead, admit your mistake confidently, apologize to the people who depended on you, and offer to make it right. These are simple steps. They address the facts, the feelings, and the responsibility of the situation. Even though other people may be stuck at the toddler developmental stage, you’ll be demonstrating that you, at least, have actually moved on to become a responsible grown-up.
I’m Stever Robbins. I help people build jobs and careers in leadership positions. If you want to know more, visit SteverRobbins.com.
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About the Author
Stever Robbins was the host of the podcast Get-it-Done Guy from 2007 to 2019. He is a graduate of W. Edward Deming’s Total Quality Management training program and a Certified Master Trainer Elite of NLP. He holds an MBA from the Harvard Business School and a BS in Computer Sciences from MIT.
