How to Make Good Decisions
Learn how to make a good decision by tuning in to your intuition’s little voice.
If you make decisions in your life, you can start making much better decisions much faster by learning how to listen to your heart, or your intuition, or your little voice —whatever you care to call it—instead of your shrieking monster.
I make great decisions; here’s an example. Pretend I have a lot of toxic waste and my factory is conveniently located next to the city’s water supply. There’s a decision that could be made: what do I do with the waste? And I have a voice in my head that’s screaming at me to make it. “It’ll cost so much to dispose of that toxic waste properly. You have to do something with it and dumping it in the water supply is easy and cheap. Maybe toxic waste has beneficial health consequences? Maybe all new babies will be twice as smart, since they’re born with two heads.”
How to Make Good Decisions
It’s not just me. Some businesspeople and politicians spout great, moral words while doing the opposite in private. Are they insane? Probably not. Yes, they hear voices in their head. The problem is that they’re listening to the wrong ones.
The reason it’s hard to hear the little voice is because of Shrieking Monster. That’s the voice that uses our insecurities, greed, and fear to push us into doing really stupid stuff. It says “Without a velvet Elvis poster, you’ll never impress the neighbors,” or “You’ve done so well on your diet, you deserve a tasty deep-fried brick of cheddar cheese with cream sauce and brown sugar!” Shrieking Monster justifies, explains, and gives us the excuses so we can Do The Wrong Thing and still feel self-righteous.
How to Listen to Your Intuition
Fortunately, we have another voice that’s wiser.
It’s the little voice that lives deep inside. Our little voice knows what we want, knows what’s good for us, and often makes better decisions. It’s also little. Most of the time, Shrieking Monster drowns it out.
Shrieking Monster is scared of the little voice because it knows the truth, even when the truth hurts. It remembers that prank you pulled on Alicia in tenth grade with the mustard and the pigtails. You told her it was a spaghetti sandwich. Your little voice knew that was wrong and may still want you to set things right. It knows the new coat you really, really, really, really want is too expensive. But your Shrieking Monster is scared to confront these things you already know.
How to Listen to Your Little Voice—on Paper
Let’s make your little voice less scary. Ponder a decision that’s giving you angst. Maybe it’s an ethical quandary, an issue with a co-worker, or that persistent fantasy about wrapping your boss in duct tape. Choose something really important, like: is it fair that I always have to spend the 3 minutes to type up action items after a meeting?
Grab paper, a pen, and a calming beverage. Think about the decision and notice all the Shrieking Monster rants. “I’m being treated so unfairly, everyone’s against me!” While it rants, put your attention on the middle of your chest. Then when Shrieking Monster stops to take a breath, quickly ask, “What do I know is the right decision, and just don’t want to admit?” Then sit. After a few minutes, beneath the Monster you’ll get a sense of the answer. Sometimes it’s in words, or maybe even just a feeling.
Write down what it says, especially the stuff that makes you feel oogie. You don’t have to believe what it says. You don’t have to approve it. Just write it down. Then put it away for a little while and take a break.
Go do something that satisfies your big voice: play a violent video game, knit an anatomically correct image of Michelangelo’s David. Then review your paper. What did your little voice say that was worth listening to? You’re separating yourself from the little voice by time and by writing, so you can enter a new frame of mind before you read them.
Listening to Your Intuition Helps You Make Better Decisions
For me, the answer the little voice gives is almost always the moral thing, the ethical thing, the loving thing, or the compassionate thing. My little voice sometimes sacrifices short-term gain for long-term peace of mind. Often, that’s the right decision (though Shrieking Monster would never admit that). But those aren’t always easy decisions in the short term. Once I pointed out at a full staff meeting that we were doing something unethical in our company. That probably affected my career path. But I could sleep better at night and felt good about myself. Many months later, people from that meeting told me they secretly looked to me for direction because they trusted me to tell the truth. Given the choice between short-term career advancement and long-term becoming the kind of person others look up to…? For me, the little voice’s decision was the right one.
When your Shrieking Monster helpfully points out how easy it would be to dump toxic waste in the water supply, how expensive correct disposal is, how regulations are so unfair, and how nobody will know it’s your fault when their kids are born with tails…take a deep breath. Then sit quietly and listen to the Little Voice behind the shrieking monster. It just might have some good advice about how to make much better decisions.
Work Less, Do More, and have a Great Life!
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